KALPATHY –
DOWN MEMORY LANE (2) -
STORY
It is exactly after 30
years, I am touching the soil of Kalpathy (A small village in Kerala) - Today
is 14th of November, 2006.
The time is 4.00 AM. In
a few hours from now, the climatic three-day extravaganza of the nine day
festivities, - what lakhs of Keralites, irrespective of caste or creed - in and
around Palakkad and nearby towns and villages in particular - eagerly look
forward, will unfold. “Kaasiyil Paathi Kalpathy…,” (Kalpathy is 50% of
Varanasi) they say. In a sense, even I am here for a wholesome dip to wash off
my sins, (paapa), and for making amends (parihaara!)
The Kalpathy River,
however, flows in its usual majestic splendour. It was on a similar night three
decades back, I bade good bye to this soil. In fact, two of us – Radhika and
myself. Poor girl, she never got the chance to feel and smell the proverbial
“Ther Kaattu” (Chariot Breeze) again! She left last year, leaving me to
silently endure the sufferings. The end was sudden and unexpected………... … How I
wish she was with me till my last breath! Such a solace she was, and I could
bury all my pangs of sorrow on her caring shoulders!
Appa and Amma must have
been shattered. I was a coward. I never dared to face them, and handle things
properly. And, at no point of time did Radhika ever question whatever I did.
Now, after thirty years, I wish better sense prevailed. But then, it is too late……Radhika
would always say, “What you sow, so you reap...” God! And how we reaped!
UDAY. That was our son.
When he was born, our joy knew no bounds. Bharani was his birth star. ‘He is
going to rule the world’, they said, “Bharani, dharani aalvaan, nee vena
paathukko”.. (you just wait and see, “Bharani” will rule the world) It was
Radhika’s idea to name him so. “He will bring us lots of luck, see”, she said.
And, luck, he got us aplenty, indeed. All the fortunes we built in the
Mahanagar that is Bombay, was after Uday arrived. Both of us were civil
engineers from NSS, Palakkad. While I took to construction, she confined
herself to design.
Our career graph
started growing upward, and very rapidly, at that. Those were the years when
there was a severe dearth for civil engineers. Every one aspired to be only
mechanical engineer, or chemical engineer, no takers for civil! There was no
Electronics, or other branches, as we have now. There were only three basic
streams, civil, electrical & mechanical. Trivandrum & Trichur offered
chemical also. But very limited seats. The net result was that by the time we
came out of college in 1975, the demand for civil engineering graduates far
exceeded the supply.
When Uday was three, we
decided to have another child. We didn’t want our son to suffer from single
child syndrome. I was the only child for my parents. And I knew what it is
being a single child, though realization dawned much later in life. My dad
probably didn’t realize the hazards then, and the pangs this would bring me
later. Perhaps he felt he couldn’t afford a second child. Anyway, much to our
delight, Sandhya was born. Magam was the star. “Magam piranna Manga”, (The girl
born on Magam star) we all rejoiced. I suggested the name, and she agreed,
“Assthikkoru Aaan, Aasaikkoru Ponn”, (a son to inherit your wealth and a
daughter to fondle) I said. “No more experiments!” Being from Palakkad, she was
able to understand most of our typical usages, though she could not get the
more intricate ones!
Our growth was phenomenal.
Uday and Sandhya were also growing. Both were good at studies, and when other
parents would take leave and sit with their children even for class exams, we
hardly knew how the kids were doing. The reports, however spoke for themselves.
Again, we were too busy with our jobs, or ‘career’, as the management jargon
goes. Uday got into engineering, “Triple – E” which was the fad at that time.
Sandhya was very clear about her priorities, “commerce is my cuppa tea”, she
would say, and the brilliant girl that she was, she cleared CA in her maiden
attempt, again with rank. We were “Neighbours’ envy, and Owners’ pride.” We had
everything. But then destiny had different plans. After 30 years, I realize the
full significance of ‘Vinai vithaithavan’ (One who has sown hatred) ………… Yes,
the “aruvadai naal” (harvesting day) came - with a real bang!
Uday wanted to do his
MS, and got his admission with internship at Carnegie Mellon University and we
were literally in cloud nine. He went on to complete his doctorate also in his
favourite “Robotics” at Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT). Getting
into a good organization was no problem for him. Everything was too nice and
too good until one day the bomb exploded. He sent a mail saying that he is
deeply “on a bondage” with an American girl, and he ‘is’ intending to marry
her. Apparently, they were on a ‘living in’ relation for the past six months. I
sincerely wished he sought our views, but that was not to be. Radhika was
willing to accept everything, a Christian, non-Indian of diametrically opposite
cultural background and food habits – anything. But a girl almost 5 years elder
to him! That was beyond her wildest perception. As if to add insult to injury,
he posed a very valid question, “Appa mattum enna panninel?” (What did you do
Dad..?) and, that was the proverbial last straw. Or, why blame him? In a way,
he is very right! You reap only what you sow.
Yes… ! Let me take you down memory lane…………..
Appa was 70 when I
passed my PU. I do not know much about him. He wasn’t of a talking kind. Most of our
communications, I remember, were through body language. His look would speak
volumes. In fact, I had strict instructions to be back home by 7.00 at any
cost. You play, swim or whatever. But be back at the stroke of seven. That was
the order. And my schedule was very clear, and specific. 7.00 to 7.30 PM, wash,
and Naamajapam. Amma would recite, and I repeat. Each day of the week had
specific slokas, on Siva on Mondays, Durga on Fridays etc! Have dinner at the
stroke of eight, study till 9.00 and sleep. There were no peer pressures, or
parental pressures to perform and be expert in everything! Times were very
different! Crèche, KG, Pre-KG, Dyslexia, Remedial classes etc., were unheard
of. Schooling starts after the child completes 5 years. Till such time he or
she thoroughly enjoys the childhood times.
My day would start at
5.30 in the morning. After brushing the teeth with “umikkari” (fried skin of
paddy peels) (or ‘mukkeri’ in local terminology!), I start off for Kalpathy
puzha for a hearty swim and bath, washing of clothes etc. Morning rituals are
carried out on the river bank itself! After Sandhya Vandanam, I would return
home by 8.30 or so. (My ‘Upanayanam’ was conducted just as I completed seven
years) Amma would feed me whatever is there, Arisi adai, (Rice cake) most of
the times. There will be iddlies occasionally. Dosa was a luxury, because oil
was costly! It was much later that I came to know that she was starving most of
the days! I could feel the ball gliding through my throat now!
Go to school, which was
3 miles away. All of us would walk. Very few houses. Mostly mangoe groves.
Pluck whatever is within reachable height, run away when the caretaker chased
us with a stick! What a life, that was! In school, it was a different story.
HM-cum-owner, Mr. Sharma was very strict. Always seen with a long cane, he must
have been replacing the ‘weapon’ at least thrice a week. I myself have seen it
breaking couple of times. Twice or thrice, I too have felt the ‘heat’. “Chutta
pedai kedachaa thaan neengal ellam uruppaduvel…” (You will flourish later, only
if you taste the hot caning from me now) - His standard dialogue! But being a
fairly brilliant student, I was generally spared of his wrath.
Appa was a
disciplinarian to the core. On the other hand, Amma was very compassionate, and
understanding. She could talk convincingly - on any subject! I learnt many a
mantras from her which I can recite even today, and several keerthanas,
varnams, my God! So many values she had planted in my tiny brains - values
which helped me quite a bit in the latter part of my life.
She used to sing very
well, but Appa wasn’t particularly enthusiastic about music! (You don’t relish
the finer aspects of life when stark realities are staring at your face,
perhaps! These finer aspects are most often overlooked, wantonly or otherwise!)
In fact, quite a few
girls of the village used to come to my mother to learn a new song, or a new
mantra. It is still a terrific puzzle to me to understand how she managed to
learn new songs like “Bhavayami Raghuramam” and all that much before they
became popular! Our neighbour had a radio, and perhaps amma would be listening
to the kutcheries being broadcast, (all houses had a single partition wall and
the happenings around – the arguments, the ‘oodals’ of day time, and the
‘koodals’ after the sunset – in the neighbour’s house were for free public
entertainment!) and the records played during festivals, especially Navaratri.
She had a tremendous memory, and grasping power. I could have inherited them,
partly, at least!
After PU, I was getting
ready to go to Bombay to try my fortune as a stenographer or PA to some
executive in a private firm. But Amma was very adamant, “Ore pullai thane,
chamathu, nannaa padikkarathu. Eppidiyaavathu mela padippikkalaam”. (He is our
only son – and very smart; studying well also. Somehow we will make him study
further) She wanted to see her son as Engineer. Whatever meagre income Appa
brought through upaadhyaayam was just enough to run the family. She would make
pickles and sell them, do all kinds of odd jobs like stitching petticoats,
gowns, blouses and all that. By God’s grace, I got a scholarship for fees
waiver, and mess allowance, but then the other expenses were heavy. It is still
a mystery to me how Amma managed! Five years at NSS rolled off just like that!
When I passed in first
division, she must have been the happiest person. Appa just gave a wry smile,
when I showed him my registration number in tiny black letters under the heading
‘first class’ in “Mathrubhumi” newspaper! Surely, they must have hoped that
this guy will now take care of them for the remaining days. As destiny would
have it, the sparkle in Radhika’s eyes was much more powerful than the hopes
and expectations of my parents at that point in time! Not that I have much
regrets. I only wish I did not act in an utterly cowardice manner as I
did! Rather than facing the situation
boldly, both of us decided to run away, fearing chaos. Radhika was Ezhava, and
I was from a highly orthodox Brahmin family. Society was not as permissive and
understanding as it is today. Both families would have come down heavily on us,
and we were really scared of our lives! Radhika’s two elder brothers were local
‘dadas’ and I am sure they would not have taken things kindly. They would have
made a pulp of me when they came to know. Everything seemed insignificant at
that time. And it was on a similar foggy Ther eve, we fled and took the train
to Bombay.. Rest, as the saying goes, is history.
After Uday totally
severed all connections with us, we were pinning all our hopes on Sandhya.
Money we had in plenty. But at some point in life, you yearn for something
else. Sandhya gave us no clue till the last moment, and on a fine Saturday
evening, she came home with a boy and introduced him as her husband! “Meet
Mathew Varghese, my husband”, she said, “We got married at the Registrar Office
this afternoon. And tomorrow is the formal wedding at Byculla CSI church”. Both
were colleagues, apparently. The earth was literally caving in under our feet
at that moment !
Next morning Radhika
had a heart attack. Though she survived, her health was going from bad to
worse. Exactly after 10 months, she left for her abode leaving me high and dry.
Old age without the support of your wife is terrible, let me tell you. I would
call Radhika a dozen times every day, realizing with a shock that she is no
more with me. But then, she was living at every inch of our palatial bungalow.
I never bothered to find out about Uday or Sandhya. It is after all their life,
and they have every right to live it the way they want. God bless them!
Later, I met my close
friend Venkittu at VT by chance. He told me about the pathetic end of Appa and
Amma. I wept like a 3 year old when I learnt that mother died soon after I
ditched every one. And, there was only father to light her pyre. Seems he
collapsed after lighting it and breathed his last! Apparently, it was the
talking point for all the nearby villages for a very long time.
Here I am, standing
alone, on the banks of Kalpathy river, or what is popularly known as “Neela”
river, (Neela in Sanskrit means fish) flowing without any emotion, or care for
all the happenings around. I don’t know how much water has flown through since
that fateful night few decades ago. Pretty much, must be!
The sun is slowly
showing up, and the villages are getting active for the grand finale. Another
three days, everyone would forget everything; the only thought is the
celebrations, and taking good care of the guests. After the Theru, (Chariot
festival) I will be going to the Govindarajapuram village to register my name
in the society which deputes Brahmins for Sapindeekaranam (10th day function
after the death of someone in the family) wherever there is a need. All the
wealth me and Radhika amssed, I have donated to a charitable society in Matunga
which takes cre of the education of brahmin children. I am very clear about the
noble path I will be treading for the rest of my life. It is a strong
conviction and I have chosen my path for the rest of my life. What better way
to amend for the pangs of sorrow I had inflicted on my parents...... !
PS:
The story is out and
out a figment of imagination; any resemblance to the characters – living or
dead – is somewhat intentional..! To an extent, the content summarizes my
childhood experiences, observing the happenings around, and most importantly,
bits of information gathered by listening to people, and the ocean of knowledge
they gave me.
Please do not ask me
what is the ‘moral’ of the story, ’coz there isn’t any!
If any one feels hurt
after reading this, well it is your problem!
For more insight into
the “history” part of Kalpathy the ‘chariot festival’, & origin of Kerala
Brahmins (‘Pattars’ as they are popularly known!) please read PART 1 –
‘(HISTORY)’by the same author
http://anandforever-anand.blogspot.com/2016/11/kalpathy-down-memory-lane-1-history.html
Anand
